Sister Holly Lewya’s blog 10th July

Hello, this is Sister Holly Lewya secretly typing away in the cloisters to take advantage of writing a guest blog to run alongside Sister Mary Lazarus.

Sister Laz, as we like to call her, (behind her back mind you; never to her face) can reduce the strongest of us to our knees in repentance with just one raised eyebrow.

Last week Sister Ginan Tonic shook so much during choir practice she had to hide behind Sister B. Attitude. Of course these aren’t the real sister’s names I’ve had to change them to protect the innocent.

Mother Superior is all of fluster with the shenanigans of the new nun Sister Mary Clarence who is certainly an influence on some of the nuns, don’t tell anyone I told you but today I witnessed with my own eyes some nuns twerking!! Saints preserve us. Just wait until Monsignor hears about this.

I’ve also heard some rumours that Sister Mary Clarence is in trouble and the police are somehow involved. How can that be? We know she came to us from a progressive order but she’s too nice to be mixed up in anything that has caused police intervention.

I’d better sign off now because if I get caught using Sister Mary Laz’s typewriter I’ll be in big trouble, Last time I was in bother with her she made me wash the pots and pans after Sister Perpetual Pain had cooked supper and burnt every single pan.

I hope some of my sisters will be brave enough to defy Sister Laz and write a blog, it’s all in good fun really.

Blessings and good twerking to you all.

Sister Holly Lewya.

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